I’m so excited to share today’s guest post with you, from Jen Weaver! She is a wonderful writer and I love what she has to say. I hope you all enjoy reading this as much as I did! You can check out her book, A Wife’s Secret to Happiness, here.
I like to ask “why?” As a young child, I’d torment my loving parents with my favorite questions on repeat all the live long day. But why? How come?
The sky is blue. How come?
You can’t drink milk with a fork. But why?
Your sister needs a nap. How come?
Mommy needs a nap. But why? Because Mommy’s tired. How come?
As an adult with a toddler of my own, I’ve acquired a greater appreciation for my parents’ patience. And, I’ve come to realize, I still like to ask “why?”
My inquisitive nature carries perks. I’m skilled at research, and I love learning. But other times it keeps me stuck in the past. I start the how come debate because I assign blame, especially when it comes to my marriage.
- Married life isn’t what I expected.
- I don’t feel connected to my husband right now.
- Why aren’t we on the same page?
Sure, I’ll have mature moments of self-inspection and repentance for the less-than-helpful roles I’ve played. But most of the time, my first thoughts turn to what Jared is doing wrong. Why are things the way they are? Him.
Or I’ll consider struggles we’ve faced, some I assume are much harder than those of my friends. How come we’re in this tough spot, and their path seems so much easier?
I can doubt God’s plan for our relationship in the midst of a cold, lonely season.
I mistrust His provision in a time of great loss.
And I’ve found the Lord is not intimidated by my messiness. He doesn’t shrink back from doubts and fears, but longs to stand there with me as I wrestle with my wonderings. Even when I’m hurt, or confused, God welcomes the discussion.
Even still, I can’t let why be my final destination. My assessment of the past and appraisal of my current circumstances must lead me to action.
- I’m in this unwanted place/season/situation.
- I’m experiencing less than a full, free, abundant life.
- My relationship could use a bit more of God’s presence and favor.
Each time my dialogue with Jesus reaches that pivotal transition, I make way for Him to minister to my heart in a new way.
I may not understand why. Some of these circumstances may plague me at no fault of my own. But Lord, what do you want me to do now?
I can’t begin to tell you how much Jesus loves this new list of questions. When I turn from pointing fingers, I get to partner with Him in the next steps. If you find yourself in a prolonged season of how come inquiry, I bring encouragement. God is ready to do a new thing. He wants to stand with you, wrestle with you, as you share the reservations that burn in your heart and plague your mind. And He’s waiting to lead you to answers through a new line of questioning.
What now, Lord?
His now instruction may come with areas of obedience or rest. Of patience or perseverance. Of prayer warfare or of seeking external guidance. Some of us may continue asking why along the journey of what now baby steps. And for others, you know in your heart that it’s time to set aside those how come concerns and make room for a different conversation with Jesus.
He’s ready and waiting. What now?
Jen Weaver is the author of A Wife’s Secret to Happiness and is passionate about sharing strength with others as a Bible teacher, speaker, and blogger at thejenweaver.com. She’s also one of the hosts of The Declare Conference, a conference that equips women to walk in their calling as Christian communicators. She’s on social media as @thejenweaver and she’d love to connect with you, especially on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest.
Her recent book, A Wife’s Secret to Happiness, shares eleven powerful, practical blessings that God wants to pour into your lap like sweet spiritual confetti, and the wifestyle habits that attract or reject this divine provision. Available wherever books are sold. Click here to read a free sample chapter.